That a good heart, these days, is hard to find - True love, the lasting kind - (A Good Heart - Feargal Sharkey)

After such a busy weekend Monday was kind of OK. I had a good nights sleep and actually woke up ready to face the week.  Once again, it is a busy, busy week.  I heard this week's song on the radio the other day and I thought that it was kind of significant.  I wonder how many of you started singing it when you read the title?  I particularly thought the following was quite apt and decided that these songs are the soundtrack to my life.  So if this ever gets turned into a film (I am joking) at lease the music score is already there:

I hear a lot of stories (well live them actually)

I suppose they could be true

All about love and what it can do to you

Highest risk of striking out

The risk of getting hurt

And still, I have so much to learn

Go on Feargal sing it my son!

Monday:  I am training for most of this week which means I have a different commute. I had to catch the tube. I did have to smile, we were like sardines squashed in a tin.  Fortunately, I only had to go about six stops and did eventually get a seat but the tube was like an oven. I am training in Old Street and I really do like that village. I could quite easily work that end of town. There is a street with all pop up food outlets which I did look at for lunch, but I don't want to spend £6 a day for lunch.  However, it did smell rather delicious. 

I did have plans for tonight but they were shelved and to be honest, I am quite pleased as I want an early night as this week is going to be very busy.  Two very different, yet equally enjoyable phone calls this evening.  The first one, will

at the moment, remain anonymous but maybe more later in the week. Then I was on the phone for ages laughing, again like teenagers, with Jackie.  It is like our weekly counselling session.  We both just laughed an laughed and at one point we could not breathe as we were laughing so much.  She is planning to come and see me again for a long weekend soon and that will be great.  All is well.

Tuesday:  Strange day today for so many reasons.  The weather was absolutely pouring down one minute then sunny and really warm the next.  I went to the Churchyard and drunk my 'Green' then I had to be in a completely different village for a meeting for work this evening.  I do not do McDonalds so I found an independent 'restaurant' and I use that term very loosely.  All I will say is, I was in Brixton.  So I go in this place, it looked clean, but everything was either chicken or ribs in a wrap, except one vegetarian option of a vegetable wrap.  Well I ordered that and the guy was very polite. I went to take a seat and started to read the paper. He come over and said would I like salad on it so I walked back to the counter with him. He put loads of salad in this wrap, then said oh I will put it on a plate for you, not on this tray and would you like a drink? So diet coke later and my wrap on a plate when everyone else's is on a plastic tray I am sitting there and another member of staff come over and ask if it was OK and did I need any sauces. I was being treated like a Princess in this fast food outlet. It was like I, and I mean just me, were dining at the Savoy. It was as if I was some sort of food

critic.  I kept expecting of one of the Young People I worked with in a previous life to rock up as this 'establishment' was full of young people. It really was a bit surreal to be honest.  But I guess this is what if feels like to a greater extent, if you are a food critic or someone who can afford to eat out at the best restaurants in London; as opposed to a BBQ wrap outlet in Brixton!  It is all rock and roll in London I mean, who needs The Ivy!

Went to my meeting and that was a treat.  I do not want to say much about it but I had to wait in 'Reception' for a while and well what a delight that was.  It is a good job I have worked where I have in a previous life.  Such a colourful array of diversity.  Then I was challenged when walking to the toilet, quite rightly too, and ended up being 'escorted' to the ladies by a rather nice man ............ every opportunity.  The meeting finished at 21.10 then on the bus home, made a cup of tea and went straight to bed.  It has been a long day.

I forgot to mention to you my purchase on Saturday (along with the cacti).  I treated myself to a new light shade for my room. It cost me £3 in B&Q.  This is

the woman who used to delight in shopping at John Lewis and now I am happy living as a student.  As you can (hopefully) see, it is a globe and I can see now as I look up, Australia, New Zealand and Thailand.  Hanging underneath are my two angels I bought a few years ago.  I used to have them hanging off the light fitting in my little cottage and here they are now watching over me as I sleep.  I love my little light shade and it is great to have my angels back.  It is funny how sometimes just the simplest things can bring you the most pleasure.

Wednesday:   And so we start the day with psychic radio. My friend Sarah always comments on my blog and we were talking about her first record which was Ballroom Blitz by Sweet.  Right on queue this morning, on the radio was Ballroom Blitz!  I guess it gave Living in America a break!

Hospital appointment his morning just for some routine bloods.  It is so funny as I could have gone to Guy's for it and as many of you know, that is where my dear old Dad was looked after.  However, St Thomas's is more convenient for my commute so I caught the bus outside of the flat and off I rolled.  I was pleasantly surprised.  A 15 minute wait for bloods then a lovely coffee in the M&S cafe.

On the bus a lovely man and his dog, Pip come and sat next to me.  Pip a border terrier cross and I made a fuss of him.  I got a bit upset as it reminded me of my dear, sweet Hetty.  She was my best friend and like everything else I seem to touch, she had to go as well.  One of my friends, Kim, sent me a link today for the National Trust and she sent it to me, with love.  It is a poem by  
Dr John Cooper Clarke called When The Sea Comes In.

http://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/article-1355902040273/?campid=Social_SharingButton_Email

It really is such a beautiful, moving poem that celebrates my love of the sea. I really do need to go and see the sea soon, it has been far to long.

After work, I went to our local theatre to see a wonderful play called Casa

Valentina. This was with one of my Meet Up Groups.  The play was excellent, quite moving and the time just flew by. The whole theatre was so beautifully

decorated, this photo really does not do it much justice. The Southwark Playhouse really is a little gem in my neighbourhood. They produce such quality work and I really am so lucky to have it on my doorstep.

Thursday:  Dreadful nights sleep and subsequently awoke with a headache. I feel it is going to be another long day as still training.  We it is not really training as I know it like the back of my hand, I guess it is box ticking.  However, it gives me an insight to how other people see the world and to be totally honestly, it terrifies me. 

I am a Virgo (for my sins) and as a trait we are typically organised, methodical and good communicators and it takes us a long while to trust someone and let them in to our lives and God help them if they abuse this privilege.  I have, over the years, tried to work on this; making allowances for others who can't get their act together and I am a great deal better than I ever was in my 'previous life'.  However, it ceases to amaze me how people ever manage to get through a week of their lives, let alone the whole stretch of it.  I have come to the conclusion that they do survive because they have, or are looking for, a significant other to do it for them.  I am not that person. I am no longer that person. Ironically, when I become surplus to requirements I was cited as not being organised and keeping the house and family going; but bossy and controlling.  It is a very thin line, think about it!  I guess I am fiercely independent now because of the cards that were dealt me.  Couple this with being organised is really a complete recipe for disaster to allow anyone into my inner circle.

On a different note, I watched the final episode of Doctor Foster.  Not sure if any of you have been watching it but it is about a woman GP who finds out her husband has been cheating for the past two years with a much younger woman - yes I know, no surprises there.  She has run the family, supported him in his career, earned the money and provided for them. The finale, when she outs him in front of the woman, well the 23 year old woman, he has been seeing family was utterly priceless. To watch him squirm as she unleashed the flying monkeys one by one was painful yet amusing to watch.  I swear next time, because there will be a next time, I get an email, phone call or text message I can see myself drawing on all my medical experience of watching every episode of The Royal (remember that one) ER and Holby City and transforming myself into Doctor Foster with a bag full of flying monkeys, venom and truths! The thought made me giggle one of those evil giggles.  Thinking about it, I guess that is why I could not sleep because I sure was not in Kansas Auntie Em!

Quiet night tonight.  Thought I may have plans; it transpires I did not. So a quiet night catching up on trash TV and chatting. Skateboarders on Holby; FaceTime with an American friend of Andy's followed by a FB link to Leaving on a Jet plane ....................... welcome to my world folks.  A world where the strange is reassuringly normal.  

Had a bit of a moment today. I saw a little girl, around 18-20 months old, with her, I assume mother, walking. It took me right back to my Meg when she was little.  We used to go for a walk and everything was giving her total amazement. She used to say look, look and more, more to everything.  Stopping to pick goodness knows what up from the pavement in utter amazement and joy.  I stood and smiled, patted my shoulder and shred a tear.  One aspect of my life is far from perfect but those memories are my memories and no one can steal them from me.

Friday:  Yay!  Bright, blue sky morning as I write this from my room, looking at The Shard shining in the sunlight.  Today is going to be a good day.  I love Fridays in London, there is something magical about them.  Pepe Pepe Le Phew and I went to a pub in Covent Garden called the Porterhouse.  He has been there before.  We met at our local tube and took the few stops up to Covent

Garden.  We never met until 21:00, that is the way it is in London.  This pub was amazing.  It goes over many floors. There is a cocktail floor but we went down in the basement to where the live music was. And what a treat this was.  I do like live music in a pub.  They had the NZ rugby match on the TV so I thought of you Jackie and wondered if Mal was watching it? PP got the first round in and I wanted Rekordalig and he had no idea what I was saying love him.  He have me his phone, something I must say no gay man would ever do, to write it in.  But unless I put my glasses on, I cannot see a thing.  I said don't worry I will have a bottle of lager. He come back with a pint!  Last time I was on pints of lager was in Amsterdam and that did not end well.  In fact, it ended terribly.

The band were really good and the pint of lager soon went! My round and then I could ask for what I wanted.  The band played songs like Oasis, Pulp, bit of rock and roll, blues, rock and right old mix.  I had a dance, as I do, I love to dance and PP joined in.  Then we started to 'hang out' with a party of people. We were all dancing and really having a great time!  The band finished with Parklife by Blur.  I remember when I lived up north and this song would come on and I would sing it JF and Meg would say that I sounded so southern, especially when it gets to the line 'it's not about you joggers who go round and round and round'.  I cannot tell you how great it was to hear just very, very southern voices singing Blur last night.  Priceless.  

So quite a few bottles of Rekordalig later and new friends who were up from Cornwall visiting their daughter and sister who, ironically worked at Guys we said our hugs (by then because you know me, that is what I do) and kisses goodbye (even PP lol) and we left the pub. PP said to me 'do you always speak to people you do not know?' Sure that is what I always do! I loved it there! We walked along the Strand laughing and talking and got on the tube and then realised we were going the wrong way ........ as you do.  Eventually, got to our home and said our goodbyes and I thanked PP for a really, really brilliant evening.  Got to the flat and I was a bit, em, tipsy! I couldn't get the key in the door, because it was the wrong key.  Three times I had to put the security light on and not once did I realise it was the wrong bloody key!  Up all those stairs to my room.  

Make up off and then I get a text message and subsequent phone call (as you do when you are very young and very, very single) from Wales.  Yes you did read that right, but more, maybe about that later.  We shall see what happens next week. A really great end to a rather dull (well 9-5) week.

As always, with my love x